Is that how you spell Peeves? It does not look right, not right at all.
Well, it's time. I can't believe I got this far without complaining about all the things wrong in the world. I always forget about things that bother me until they happen and one happened yesterday so I must give out the list.
We all have them, I am sure mine is longer than most. It is just that I hate people "so much..... stupid trash...rotten, stinky..... hate world, revenge soon.....take out on everyone."
Here they are in reverse order from super annoying to devastatingly annoying:
People that park in handicap spots that either don't have a sticker or do have a sticker but are like diabetic or something that I would not consider worthy of a handicap spot. If you can walk on 2 legs, park in the normal stalls. I understand that some people get handicap stickers that don't look disabled yet deserve and warrant a sticker but just ask yourself handicap sticker owner, "is parking in the handicap stall really necessary for me today?". That is all I ask. It is not just about parking closer, there is extra space by handicap stalls for vans with ramps and people in chairs.... oh never mind.
People that sign their letter to the editor with Dr. or ESQ or PhD or whatever and the letter has nothing to do with their title. If you want to write in about a healthcare crisis as a doctor, by all means, give your letter credibility by signing it as an MD. But if you are on the program at church as a speaker, are announcing your daughters wedding, or are speaking in a funeral, then go ahead and keep your wonderful title to yourself.
If you are LDS, or even if you are not, don't say Patriarticle instead of Patriarchal and please don't bear your testimony "in the name of thy son". That is how you close a prayer, not a testimony.
The overuse and misuse of the phrase "per se"
The under use and misuse of the semi-colon.
Any clock for any reason that is set to be slow. You can set em fast but never slow.
A man that sits through a 2 hour priesthood session and then after the final speaker gets up and leaves during the closing song before the closing prayer.
If you are a man and you walk into a restroom with a room full of empty urinals and you walk into one of the stalls to pee then you are a loser and I hate you.
If you ever use or submit a birthday announcement to the paper that uses the phrases "Lordy Lordy, look who's Forty" or Nifty nifty, look who's fifty" something painful should happen to you soon.
Reporters that interview people during tragedies and keep interviewing people until they find one that will say "this is the worst _______ I have seen in ____ years".
People (and actually almost everyone screws this up) that say "I could care less". If you COULD care less than you care a lot. If you "couldn't care less" than you really don't care at all which is what you really want to say there.
People that miss-time the giving of an opening or closing prayer in church and get there too early while the hymn is still playing and have to stand there a few paces away from the microphone. They never go all the way up to the microphone, they wait a few paces away for some reason. Just don't try to time it, wait until the hymn is over to stand up for heaven's sake.
Socks with sandals.
People that say Porn instead of calling it what it really is, Pornography. Porn is the hip cool way to say it so it justifies it's use and abuse.
And finally, when I hold the door open for someone and they have to touch the door on the way in for some reason. I may have it swung open as far as humanly possible but they still feel like they have to touch it, like they are helping with the act of me holding it open or something. Thanks for the help but just walk through the freaking door already.
If we have learned anything today it is that I am one bitter person. Oh well, I'll make a great old man someday soon.
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20 comments:
Yes, the timing of the prayer after the hymn. That's one reason that I'm glad I'm married to you...you always stop me before I go up too early and make a fool of myself. Thanks!
Haha! (It seems like I always begin a comment with the same thing) pet peeve?
I always touch the door when people hold it open for me! I think it makes me look appreciative! Sorry.
Amen. I'm with ya on a lot of those, I just never had the time or inclination to actually archive my pet peeves. I'm 100% with you on the Phd, MD, CRAP...I think that people who have letters after their name think that they're better than everyone else...well I got news for you, they're not. Props on the blog. You really do have issues though, just let some of it go and take a deep breath.
Emily Prusso CRAP
I couldn't care less what your pet peeves are :) The (mis)use of "I could care less" drives Matt bonkers and because he has pointed it out to me so many times, I am now obsessed. I know that Amy is really confused about this one (I've been known to call people out on this and have a lengthy discussion) so we may need to have a conference call with her to get it straightened out.
As for me, I just really hate it when people put an apostrophe in the possessive form of "its." They should become victims of random acts of violence.
Wow, that list just kept going. Was that all compiled in one sitting? I like that you included some that can be non-observable (i.e., the handicap sticker offenders and the man in the empty bathroom). I have to agree that all are pretty valid. Nice.
Cheer up buddy.
Erica, you're right, it is out of appreciation. I wish I could remember that. I am usually a pretty optimistic person in my life but when it comes to other people in society, I always think the worst of them first. I don't know why. Maybe it is because of how lame they are. I guess that would be it.
I don't know if the opening/closing prayer is a pet peeve or not, I just know that I want to hide when someone mis-times it. It makes me really embarrassed for them.
But what about stickers on fruit (apples especially), happy choir members, and Christmas music in October?
By the way, I think Christian does the door thing, too. Is that bad?
I think we need to get you into counseling!
Love mom
Hey I want to add a couple if that's ok because it just happened to me.
When you are cleaning your car (or painting the house in my case) & the neighbor says "hey, you wanna come clean (or paint) mine next?"
Ummm...no.
And, when someone opens your front door but still says "knock knock" as they walk in.
the could care less one totally irks me. "oh really? you could care less than the amount you are caring right now?"
one of the plusses of porno is that we get to watch rad shows like "to catch a predator" - so entertaining.
i think people touch the door when you hold it because they don't trust you.
don't forget people who refer to any place other than washington county as southern utah. and people that start cc games then don't show up.
Hi Shane, it's your ole neighbor Angie Spendlove. I have to disagree about the handicap parking. I get totally bugged when I go into a parking lot and there are EMPTY handicap spots and I have to park a mile away.
I feel like my long walk is justified if all the handi-spots are taken, even if it is just someone with diabetes.
On the other hand when the spots are empty I get so annoyed and think something along the lines of "did they expect every handicap in town to come to the movies all at once?" or "hmmm, i would have though walmart was more popular among retards" somthin like that.
WHAT!?!! you guys are still playing CC?!!? let a brother know!
What's cc?
Shayne. that is a lot of comments. impressive.
funny thing: most of your pet peeves are my pet peeves too. however, like Sarah said, I can't for the life of me (or is it can for the life of me?) grasp I could (couldn't) care less. seriously. I have stopped using the stupid phrase all together because it CONFUSES ME SO MUCH. I just don't (and never will) get it.
I believe after the timing of the prayers in sacrament meeting (longest and shortest) Marty's latest was rating the prayer-timing-standing-up too-soon-0r-not-soon-enough.. he has all the stats from his ward if you want them and the criteria...
What are you talking about that you'll "make a great old man someday soon"? You have been an old man for quite some time. O velhote!
For me, it's the length of prayers. I mean, pour your heart out in the closet and all that; just don't do it on my time. Especially if the meeting already is in overtime. OT church meetings drive me crazy. Someday, when someone marches up to the pulpit 67 minutes into testimony meeting, I just know I'm going to scream, "Where do you think you're going?! Did you die this week and come back from the dead to tell us about it?! If so, please take up the time I could be eating lunch. If not, SIT BACK DOWN! Oh, but I do appreciate ya."
Brook raises a good point on it's v. its. This is a cousin to the Utah plural (e.g., several bird's, 4 dog's).
On bathroom protocol, the one that gets me is when there is a row of 10 urinals and me, and some guy walks up and has to use the one right next to me. That's flat-out crazy behavior.
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